Archive for the ‘opposition’ Category

Public Speaking Problem: Too Many Questions (From One Person)!

Wednesday, September 17th, 2008
Too Many Questions From One Person Can Ruin A Speech

Too Many Questions From One Person Can Ruin A Speech

As though speaking in public was not difficult enough! Just about every technical presentation ends up with the obligatory “Question & Answers” opportunity for the audience at the end of the speech. There are actually three ways your presentation can go at this point in time: (1) nobody asks any questions – sorta embarrassing, but you can live with this as you quickly wrap up and sit down, (2) people ask good questions and you provide good answers – the perfect scenario, (3) some jerk starts asking a whole bunch of questions and just won’t give up. Let’s spend some time discussing what to do about this last scenario.

The eternal questioner (EC) is one of the strange creatures that lives in the land of public speaking. A close relative to the heckler, the EC is in love with themselves – especially the sound of their own voice. Experience has shown that the EC is most likely to be found attending your more informal speaking events: team meetings, brainstorming sessions, etc. He/she will generally avoid the big presentations to Senior Management because there is a good chance someone would shoot him/her down at those meetings.

Why does the EC do this? There are many reasons, but the best ones that I can come up with are as follows. The first is that the EC has a story that they want to tell. It really doesn’t matter what your presentation is about, they are going to use your Q&A time to tell their story. The other reason is that they have a whole series of ideas that are just jumping around in their head and they want to spill them out for everyone to see. It really doesn’t matter what their motivation is, you’re left with a problem on your hands.

How can you deal with an EC? When you encounter an EC the worst thing that you can do is nothing. Your audience is quickly seeing your presentation go from great to bad and if you don’t step in, then you’ll have to live with their final analysis forever. Here are four steps that you can take to deal with an EC:

  1. Lose the Anger: You need to realize that the EC is not doing this because you are you. Instead, you’ve got to realize that the EC does this to everyone – it’s not personal. What this means is that the worst thing that you can do is to get angry. Don’t – realize that it’s just a distraction and lose the anger.
  2. Play To Your Audience: When the EC reaches a stopping point (or takes a breath!), you need to say something that will show your audience that that you are willing to treat everyone with respect. A phrase such as “Good point, let’s talk about it afterwords.” would work. Note that this probably won’t shut the EC up, but it will win you points with the rest of the audience.
  3. Realize That Everybody’s Got ‘Em: Once again, it’s not personal. Some of the greatest communicators of our time such as Jack Welsh, Suzie, Orman, Steve Jobs, etc. have had to deal with ECs. You are not alone!
  4. Make Sure That You Have A Wingman: In order to head events like this off at the pass, it’s always a good idea to coordinate with whomever is running the meeting and have them agree to help you out if you encounter an EC. Let them play the “heavy” once the EC starts to hit his/her stride. Have the organizer step in and tell the EC to sit down and give other audience members a chance to ask their questions. This way you still have the respect and admiration of the audience.

Have you ever been in a meeting where an EC started asking questions? How long did they go on for? Did anyone try to step in and get them to stop? Where they successful? Leave a comment and let me know what you think.

Welcome To The Passive Aggressive Games!

Saturday, June 21st, 2008

Learn To Communicate In Order To Overcome Opposition
Thanks to millions of years of evolution, we are all pretty good at recognizing situations in which we are called on to compete. Our communication skills are tuned to allow us to make ourselves heard in these situations and to get our point across. Which is why we all seem to do such a poor job when we are faced with no competition, but rather opposition. Oh, oh. What to do now?

So what is opposition? Opposition is what happens when the group of people that you are trying to communicate with are just dead set against what you have to say. If you show up in a situation where you are going to be telling your team about a great new documentation system that the company has mandated that everyone will start using, you will encounter opposition if nobody that you are talking to wants to do documentation in the first place — it’s not that the new system is a bad idea (although it might be), it’s just that everyone rejects the idea of doing documentation.

What’s funny is that although in technical fields we struggle with how to deal with opposition, the folks who work in politics deal with it on a daily basis. Our elected officials are forced to deal with opposition everyday and so they have developed effective ways of dealing with it. We could learn a thing or two from them:

  • Co-opt The Other Side’s Issue: this is one of my favorite approaches. Don’t go head-to-head with the oppositon. Instead take a careful look at what’s motivating their position: why doesn’t your team want to do documentation? If you show respect for their underlying issue and then go ahead and propose a different way of solving it, you’ll basically cut off the oppositon at the knees. In our documentation case, if you show the team that offshore developers do a poor job of native language documentation and by doing a good job of documentation their work they will be able to keep more jobs onshore, then you’ve accomplished your co-opting.

  • Redefine The Issue: Initially an issue may start out as a tug-of-war. In order to solve this problem, if you redefine it in such a way that it is no longer a tug-of-war, then you can win the other side over. In our documentation example, the issue could start out as a “the company is telling us to do more work”. This could be redefined as “Other companies have created products that interface with our product. In order for them (and us) to be successful, they have to understand how our product works and so documentation is needed.” All of a sudden, what was something that was being created for the faceless company becomes a tool for specific small business owners.

If you can become skilled at learning to distinguish opposition from competition, then you will have a hard-to-find skill that you can start to use proactively. Do a little bit of research on the group that you will be communicating with. If there is strong opposition to what you will be discussing with them, it will probably come out quickly. Look for ways to co-opt or redefine the issue and you’ll have accomplished half of your job before you even open your mouth.